亲爱的朋友，威廉、崔芝、于彤呀！目前我处于一种坐卧不安的状态，就象是人们所说的那种被恶鬼驱赶着四处奔波游荡的不幸者一样。有时，我心神不定；这既非恐惧，也非渴望，而是一种内心的莫名其妙的狂躁，几乎象要撕裂我的胸膛，扼住我的喉咙！知我者，会说我担忧，不知我者谓我何求？难过呀，难过呀！于是，我只好奔出门来，在这寒冬的季节的可怕的夜里瞎跑一躺。
136书屋 www.136book.com
昨天晚上，我又不得不出去。其时适逢突然的毛毛细雨的天气，我爬上了生态园，倾听着雷州青年运河的河水在泛滥，一道道小溪在激涨，涌流而下，夜里十一时我跑出家门，赶到雷州青年运河的坝岸上。见那河水被狂暴的山风卷起漩涡，从上游顶上直冲而下，把开阔的谷地变成了一片翻腾的海洋，狂风同时发出呼啸，那景象怕人极了！尤其是当月亮重新露出脸来，静静地枕在乌云上，我面前的激流在它可怖而迷人的清辉映照下，翻滚着，咆哮着，我更是不寒而栗，心中冷不仿产生一种欲望！我面对深渊，张开双臂，心里想着：跳下去吧！跳下去吧！要是我能带着自己的不幸和痛苦，象奔腾的山洪似地冲下悬崖峭壁，这将是何等的痛快呀！唉，我却抬不起腿来，因为有很多读者在等着我，呼唤着我，于是我没有把所有的苦难一举结束的勇气！——我的时运还没有到，我觉得。威廉、崔芝、于彤呀！我真恨不得跟狂风一块儿去驱散乌云，去遏止激流，哪怕为此得付出我的生命！唉，也许连这样的欢乐也不容一个写作的人得到吧？
ｗｗｗ.136book.com
俯瞰着我每次散步时曾与爱恋一起去过的小草坪，俯瞰着那株我俩曾在下边坐过的老柳树，我心里非常难过——草坪也被水淹了，老柳树也几乎认不出来了，威廉！“还有她家的那些草地，还有她家周围的整个地区！”我想，“我们的小亭子这会儿准让激流毁得面目全非了吧！”想到此，一线往昔的阳光射进了我的心田，宛如一个病危中的人梦见了羊群，梦见了草地，梦见了荣耀的升迁一般！——我站立着，不在骂自己没有死的勇气。我本该……。
唉，我现在又坐在这儿，恰似个从篱笆上拾取烂柴和沿门告化的贫穷老头儿，苟延残喘，得过且过，毫无乐趣。
136ｂook.com
想知后事如何？请阅读第【七十】章分解
Dear friends, William, Cui Zhi, Tong on you! I am sitting and lying in a disturbed state, as it is said to be the kind of evil to drive a go wandering around, like the less fortunate. Sometimes, I uncertainty; it is neither fear nor desire, but an inexplicable sense of manic, almost like tear to my chest, Ezhu my throat! I know, I would say that concern, I do not know who I Heqiu that? Sorry for you, sorry for you! As a result, I had no choice but to go off in this winter season of terrible Xiapao I lie down at night.
Last night, I had to go out. At that time coincides with the sudden weather was drizzling, I climbed up the eco-park, listening to a young Leizhou canal in the flooding of the river, a brook Road, Stimulated in inflation, and current, 23:00 I ran out of their homes, Leizhou young people rushed to the canal shore of the dam. See that the river was blown up mountain violent whirlpool, straight from the top of the upper reaches down to the valley open a somersault into the ocean, issued by the roaring winds at the same time, that very scene being! Especially when exposed to the moon face, pillow quietly in the dark, the white water to me in a terrible and it reflects the charming Or, roll, growling, I was even more chilling, cold hearts do not have a fake Kind of desire! I have to face the abyss, with open arms, and thought: you jump! Jump off it! If I can bring their own misfortune and pain, such as Pentium Side of the mountain torrents down the cliffs, it will be very happy for you! Oh, I can not lift his legs because a lot of readers are waiting for me, calling me, so I do not have all the courage to end the suffering in one fell swoop! - My luck has not arrived, I think. William, Cui Zhi, Tong on you! I wish I could go with the wind to disperse the dark clouds, to curb the torrent, even if this were to pay my life! Well, maybe not even this kind of joy can not be a person who has been writing, right?
Every time I walk down the love and had been together a small lawn, overlooking the Nazhu both of us had been in the bottom of the old willow, I was very sad - the lawn was also flooded, and also the old willow Almost did not recognize it, William! "There are those of her home turf, and her family around the region as a whole!" I think, "now we have the potential to allow small pavilion was damaged beyond recognition and a white water!" Think of this, the first-line past the sun into the My heart, like a critically ill person in the dream of a flock of sheep, the dream of grass, the dream of the glory of the general promotion! - I am standing, not criticize their courage has not died. I had the ... ....
Oh, now I sit here, like a rotten pick up on the fence from the firewood along the doors and were of poor old man, on their last legs, muddling along, there is no fun.
I wrote this for the time being, the next set of Good-bye!
