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第30章:爱我就给我


对于生机勃勃的自然界,我心中曾有过强烈而炽热的感受,是它,曾使我欢欣雀跃,把我周围的世界变成了一个天国;可而今,它却残忍地折磨着我,成了一个四处追逐我的暴虐的鬼魅。想当初,我曾从高崖上眺望河对面那些丘陵间的富乍峡谷,看见面前的一切都生意盎然,欣欣向荣。

我曾看见群山从山脚到峰顶都长满高大茂密的树木,迂回曲折的峡谷都复盖着可爱的绿荫,河水从发出絮语的芦苇间缓缓流去,轻柔的晚风吹动着天空中冉冉飘过的白云,白云向河水投下倒影;接着,群鸟在林间发出晚噪,亿万只小昆虫在火红的夕晖中纵情舞蹈,落日的最后一蔽解放了草丛里的蟋蟀,它们唱起了歌。

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我周围的嗡嗡咉咉声使我低下了头去看看地上,注意到了从坚硬的岩石里聂取养料的苔藓以及由干燥的沙丘上蔓生垂挂下来的藤箩,它们向我揭示了大自然内在的、炽热而神圣的生命之迷。这一切的一切,我全包容在自己温暖的心里,感到自己象变成了神似的充实,辽阔无边的世界的种种美姿也活跃在我的心灵中,赋予一切一切的生机。环抱着我的是巍峨的群山,我脚边躺着道道幽谷,一挂挂瀑布飞泻而下,一条条小溪流水潺潺,树林和深山里百鸟声喧——这种神秘不可知的力量,我目睹它们在大地的怀抱中相互作用,相互影响;除此之外,在地球上,天空下,还一代一代繁衍着形形色色的生命。一切一切,应有尽有,千姿百态,最后还有人,他们为求安全而聚居在小小的房子里,却自以为能主宰这大千世界!可怜的傻瓜,你把一切都看得如此渺小,因为你自己就很渺小!——从高不可攀的群山,越过人迹未至的莽原,到世所不知的大洋的尽头,到处都有造物主的精神在空中流动,并为每一丁点能感知他的微末的生命而高兴。——唉,那时我是多么经常地渴望着,渴望借助于从我头顶经过的仙鹤的翅膀,飞向茫茫海洋的岸边,从那泡沫翻腾的无穷尽的酒杯中,吸饮着令人心醉神迷的生之欢愉,竭尽自己的心中有限的力量,感受一下那位在自己体内和通过自己创造出天地万汇的伟大存在的幸福,哪怕仅仅在一瞬间!

朋友,单单回忆起过去的这些时光,我心中便很快乐;甚至想重新唤起和说出这些无法言说的感情的努力,便净化了我的灵魂;但是,接下来,也使我倍加感到自己目前处境的可怕。

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仿佛有一面帷幕从我面前拉开了,广大的世界变成了一座张开着大口的墓穴。你能说:“这存在着”吗!唉,一切都在消失,一切都象闪电般一晃而逝,要么被洪流卷走、沉没,要么在礁石上蹦得粉碎,很难真正耗尽各自的生命力。没有一个瞬间,不是在恬吃着你和你周围亲人的生命;没有一个瞬间,你不是一个破坏者,不得不是一个破坏者,一次最无害的散步,将夺走千百个可怜的小虫子的生命;一投足,就会毁坏蚂蚁们辛辛苦苦营建起来的巢穴,把一个小小的世界踏成一片坟墓。嗨!使我痛苦的,不是世界上那些巨大但不常有的灾难,不是冲毁你们村庄的洪水,不是吞没你们城区的地震;残害我心灵的是大自然内部潜藏着的破坏力,这种力量所造就的一切,无不在损害着与它相邻的事物,无不在损害着自身。想到此,我心忧如燎。环绕着我的天和地以及它们创造生命的力量;但在我眼中,却只有一个永远不停地在吞噬和反驺的庞然大物而已。

唉!我们说点开心的好吗?好的。二十一世纪,对于我们普普通通的家庭成员来说,性不再是神秘的“禁果”,而是维系两个人感情基础的一种游戏。这种性爱“游戏说”,在男女完成生育任务之后,体现得更为实际。根据我在国外的调研经验发现,婚姻生活超过五年以上的家庭男女,在性爱上,必然会出现不同程度的“审美疲劳”,一些前卫的家庭,便会大胆追求新的性爱模式。虽说现在中国是一个相对保守的文明国家,可是受西方的性爱观念的影响“三角式”的性爱现象已经在流行,这些行为,中国传统的思想暂时还是无法接纳的。然而,“存在皆合理”,任何的事物都有多面性。于是说我们要具体内容,具体分析,逐个解决就会过上完美和谐的家庭生活。

若想知后事如何?请阅读第【三十一】章分解

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The dynamic nature, my mind had been hot and strong feelings, it has made me jump for joy joy to the world around me into a kingdom of heaven; can now, it cruel to torture me, has become I have a chase around the oppressive forces of evil. At first, I had from the high-Ya Shang view of those hills across the river between the valley’s rich, to see everything in front of the business scene is in good shape.
I have seen from the mountains to the foot of a mountain peak is covered with tall trees and dense, tortuous rehabilitation of the canyon are covered by the lovely shade, from the river’S NOTE issued by the slow flow between the reeds, blowing a gentle Wanfeng Slowly drifting away in the sky and white clouds, white clouds to cast a reflection of the river; then issue a Qunniao forest in the night noise, only hundreds of millions of small insects in the red Xihui indulgence in dance, the last sunset of the liberation of the grass cover in the cricket, They sing a song.
I am buzzing around the sound of Yang Yang and lowered his head to see me on the floor, took note of the hard rock from the NIE, taking nourishment from the moss, as well as dry sand on the trail of rattan basket hanging down, they told me reveals the inherent nature , And the heat of the sacred life of fans. All in all, I own all-inclusive in the warm heart, feel that they have become as full of spirit, boundless vast world of the various Timmia also active in my mind, given all the vitality of all. I had the ring of towering mountains, I lay feet true Valley, a hanging and the hanging Feixie Falls, a strong gurgling water, forests and mountains noisy sound of birds - a mysterious unknown Strength, I’ve seen them in the earth’s embrace of interaction and mutual influence; In addition, the earth, the sky, from generation to generation is also a proliferation of various forms of life. All in all, everything, are thousands, and last but not least, for the sake of their safety and live in a small house, but thinks it can dominate the universe! The poor fool, you can see everything so small, very small because of your own! - Unattainable from the mountains, across the deserted before the arrival of the wilderness, the world’s oceans do not know at the end, the spirit of God everywhere in the air flow, and every bit to his perception of life and happy Weimo . - Well, then how much I often desire, desire the help of my head after the crane’s wings, flying to the vast ocean shore, then the bubble somersault endless glasses, smoking is a drink The ecstatic joy of Health, to do its own limited strength in the hearts and feel that their own body to create its own and through the Department of million of the world there is great happiness, even if only in the blink of an eye!
Friends, just recalled the last time these, my heart will be very happy; even want to renew and make such a statement can not be said of the feelings of the efforts to clean it up my soul; However, the next, so I feel more present The terrible situation.
As if there is a curtain in front of me from the beginning, the majority of the world into a large open mouth of the tomb. Can you say: "This is the existence of" right! Well, everything disappears, everything is gone in a flash like lightning, or by the powerful current swept away, sank or bouncing on the rocks in pieces, it is difficult to really run out of their vitality. Not a single moment, instead of eating Tian around you and your loved ones life; do not have a moment, you are not a destroyer, had to be a destroyer, one of the most harmless walk will take hundreds of poor little bug Of life; a cast all, the ant will destroy up construction of their hard-earned nest, a small step into a grave in the world. Hi! I am suffering, not those of the world’s great disaster, but not always, you are not washed away villages in the flood, you are not engulfed City earthquake; harm my mind that the internal nature of the destructive potential of such forces to create Everything all at the expense of its neighbors and the things, all at the expense of its own. Think of this, I would like Liao Xin You. Around my days, as well as to create their life force; but in my eyes, but only one is always kept up the anti-Zou and the only monster.
Alas! We are happy you said that the point?好的. The twenty-first century, for us ordinary members of the family, and is no longer a mysterious "forbidden fruit" but the two maintain feelings of the people on the basis of a game. Love this "game", men and women in the reproductive tasks to complete, reflect the more realistic. According to my study abroad experience, more than five years of married life more than family men and women in the sex, are bound to be varying degrees of "Shenmeipilao", some of the avant-garde of the family will pursue a bold new model of sex. Although China is now a relatively conservative civilized nations, but the Western concepts of sex "triangle" of the phenomenon of sex has been popular in these acts, the traditional Chinese thinking is not acceptable for the time being. However, "there are all reasonable," any of the multidimensional nature of all things. So we have to say that the specific content of the specific analysis, case-by-case solution would be to have a perfect and harmonious family life.



I - Luo Jun writer wrote this for the time being, the next set of Good-bye!